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Country Jokes

221
  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Breast Milk

    A Japanese exchange student sat in a science classroom, totally stumped at a question on the final exam. The question asked: "Give four advantages of breast milk." What to write? He sighed, thinking he could not use personal experience. Suddenly, he smiled, remembering some things he has overheard his mother say. He wrote: 1. No need to boil. 2. Never goes sour. 3. Available whenever necessary. He still needed a fourth answer. He tried to put himself in the place of a child, but that didn't work. Suddenly, he smiled again. He wrote as the final answer: 4. Available in attractive containers of varying sizes.

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  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    No cruise

    *** Country Jokes ***

    Q: Why don't black people go on cruises?
    A: They already fell for that shit once before.

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Drowned

    A Chinese man has died in a river in Beijing. Police say that he may have been saved if the first 5 people to see him hadn't thought they were looking at their reflection

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Famous French joke on the Americans

    *** Country Jokes ***

    Q : 'What's the difference between an American and a pot of yoghurt?'
    A: 'After a period of time, the yoghurt begins to develop cultures.'"

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    French legionaries hiking

    Three French legionaries are hiking across the desert where they have been for several days. They are out of food and on their last ration of water. As they walk a bit further, the head legionary thinks he sees something up ahead and cries to the others ( in a French accent ), " look! It is a bacon tree! It is what we ' ave been waiting for! And sure enough, there seems to be a tree covered with streaky bacon. Of course the legionaries are delighted, so desperate that they don't even consider the possibility of it being a mirage. As they get closer, the head legionary says, " Stay ' ere. I will investigate ". So he approaches, but as he does so, two gunshots penetrate the deadly silence, seeming to com from the bacon tree, and strike down the legionary. The tree disappears. The other two rush to see if there is anything they can do, but it seems almost too late. " Sir!" they cry, "are you alright?" And the head legionary, before he dies, says, " Zat was not a bacon tree... zat was an ' ambush!"