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Men Women Jokes

463
  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Whereabouts

    Q: What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
    A: A widow.

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Poetry

    There were these two guys that worked together, a black guy and a white guy. Every morning the black would come into work in a pissed-off mood, but the white guy was always really happy and friendly to everyone. Well one day the black decided to find out how the white guy managed to be so happy day after day. He asked the white guy " Man, how do you stay so damn happy all of the time?" The white guy answered, " Well, every morning, I recite my wife a poem so I can get laid before I come into work!" The black says, " Hey, that's a pretty good idea, man! What do you say?" The white guy replies, " Well, this morning, I wrote her this poem: ' Honey, with your hair so blond and your eyes so blue, all I wanna do is make love to you! " The black decides to try this with his wife. The next morning, the black guy walks into work with a bloody lip, a broken nose, and scratches all down his face!" The white guy asks him what happened. The black guy says, " I tried reciting poetry to my wife like you do!" The white guy asks "What the hell did you say to her?" The black guy goes," I said, ' Honey, with your hair so nappy and your eyes like a frog, bend your fat ass over, let me do ya like a dog!"

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Secret

    A young guy was complaining to his Boss about the problems he was having with his stubborn girlfriend. "She gets me so angry sometimes I could hit her, the young man exclaimed." "Well, I'll tell you what I used to do with my wife" replied the Boss. "Whenever she got out of hand I'd take her pants down and spank her". Shaking his head the young guy replied "I've tried that... it doesn't work for me. Once I get her pants down I'm not mad anymore."

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  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Top 5 Reasons Why Computers are Female

    Top 5 Reasons Why Computers are Female. 1) Even the smallest mistakes are committed to memory for future reference. 2) The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. 3) The message "Bad command or filename" is about as informative as “ if you don't know why I am mad at you, then I certainly won't tell you.” 4) As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your pay check on accessories for it / her. 5) Nobody but their creator understands their logic.

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Never Done Anything Wild ?

    A Boy With Green, Red And Blue Hair Was Passing By. When An Old Man Was Staring At Him: "Watzup Oldie Never Done Anything Wild?" Old Man: "Yes, Fucked A Peacock Once Was Wondering If You Are My Son"