Santa Banta Jokes96
Santa was suffering from a terrible headache, so he went to see his doctor, a young, recent medical graduate. The young doctor listened to him carefully and told him, "Go home, Lie down on your tummy, Open your arse wide, and ask your wife to pour some gin up your arse-hole." "What???" said Santa. The headache was really killing him, so Santa went home and, very skeptically, tried out what the doctor told him. And guess what, the headache vanished! So Santa goes running back to the doc, and says, "Doctor, doctor, where did you learn this amazing cure?" And the doctor replies modestly, "Oh that's nothing. They taught us this on our very first day in medical school" "Really?" says Santa, "This is what they taught you in medical school?" "Yes, of course. They said for a headache you should always prescribe Anal-gin.
Santa in Trouble!
Banta noticed that Santa was looking depressed, and asked what was wrong. "Well," said Santa, "I ran afoul of one of those awkward questions women ask. Now I'm in deep trouble at home." "What kind of question?" asked Banta. "My wife asked me if I would still love her when she gets old, fat and wrinkly." "That's easy," said Banta. "You just say 'Of course I will'." "Yeah," said Santa, "That's what I did, except I said 'Of course I DO...'"
Money Well Spent
Santa walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Was I in here last night?" "You certainly were," replies the bartender. "And did I spend a lot of money?" Santa asked. "You spent over Rs. 10000," replies the bartender. "Thank god for that," says Santa, "I thought I'd wasted it."
Santa had an obsession with women's breasts. So he went to a psychologist and told the doctor about his problem. "I am going to do word association," explained the doctor. "I am going to say a word, and you will say the first thing that come to your mind." "OK Doctor," replied Santa. Doctor, "Oranges". "Breasts," replied Santa. "Apples" "Breasts" "Watermelons" "Breasts" "Wipers" "Breasts, " said Santa "Wait a minute! I can see the connections between oranges, apples, watermelons and breasts. But automobile's wipers? Where is the connection?" asked the doctor. "Easy, one on the left and one on the right!"