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Adult Jokes

1058
  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Hairy

    Yo mama so hairy, that you need a lawn mower for her back

    Related:

    Yo Mama

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  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Revenge

    *** Adult Jokes ***

    A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round trip ticket. All he needed to do was somehow get to the airport, and then he'd be home-free. So he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting. He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie. He promised to send the driver money from home. He offered him his credit card numbers, his drivers license number, his address, etc... The cabbie said, "If you don't have fifteen dollars, get the hell out of my cab!" So the businessman was forced to hitchhike to the airport and was barely in time to catch his flight. One year later the businessman, having worked long and hard to regain his financial success, returned to Vegas and this time he won big. Feeling pretty good about himself, he went out to the front of the casino to get a cab ride back to the airport. Well who should he see out there, at the end of a long line of cabs, but his old buddy who had refused to give him a ride when he was down on his luck. The businessman thought for a moment about how he could make the guy pay for his lack of charity, and he hit on a plan. The businessman got in the first cab in the line, "How much for a ride to the airport," he asked? "Fifteen bucks," came the reply. "And how much for you to give me a blowjob on the way?" "What?! Get the hell out of my cab." The businessman got into the back of each cab in the long line and asked the same questions, with the same result.When he got to his old friend at the back of the line, he got in and asked, "How much for a ride to the airport?" The cabbie replied, "Fifteen bucks." The businessman said, "OK," and off they went. Then, as they drove slowly past the long line of cabs, the businessman gave a big smile and thumbs up sign to each of the other drivers

    Related:

    Gambling

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Alligator

    A man goes to a strip club with an alligator. He says, "I bet you that I can put my dick into this alligator's mouth for 1 minute, and when I take it out, it will not be damaged. If I succeed, all of you will buy me drinks. If I fail, I will buy all of you drinks." The other men agree and he puts his dick into the alligator's mouth for 1 minute. After 1 minute, he hits the alligator on the head with a beer bottle, and he opens his mouth. To everyone's surprise, his dick is unharmed. "Now, before you buy me drinks, does anybody else want to try?" After a while, someone in the back finally raises their hand. It's a woman. "I guess I can try," she says, "but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with a beer bottle."

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    Old

    *** Adult Jokes ***

    Yo mama so old her butt crack sealed

    Related:

    Yo Mama

  • Posted on 22/11/2016

    मज़ा ही मज़ा!

    एक लड़की की शादी हुई और उसकी सहेली को उसकी सुहागरात के बारे में जानने की बड़ी ही उत्सुकता थी।
    सहेली: बता ना कल रात को क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: कुछ नहीं।
    सहेली: पर कल तो तेरी सुहागरात थी, कुछ तो हुआ होगा?
    लड़की: कह रही हूँ ना कुछ नहीं हुआ।
    सहेली: अच्छा तो मुझे कल रात की सारी घटना बता।
    लड़की: रात को दस बजे मेरे पति कमरे में आये।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: उन्होंने अपना कोट उतारा और खूँटी पर टांग दिया।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर उन्होंने अपनी टाई उतारी और खूँटी पर टांग दी।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर उन्होंने अपनी शर्ट उतारी और खूँटी पर टांग दी।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर उन्होंने अपनी बनियान उतारी और और खूँटी पर टांग दी।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर उन्होंने अपनी बेल्ट उतारी और खूँटी पर टांग दी।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर उन्होंने अपनी पैंट भी उतार कर खूँटी पर टांग दी।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर उन्होंने मेरी साड़ी उतारी और खूँटी पर टांग दी।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर मेरा ब्लाउज उतारा और खूँटी पर टांग दिया।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर उन्होंने मेरा पेटीकोट भी उतारा और खूँटी पर टांग दिया।
    सहेली: फिर क्या हुआ?
    लड़की: फिर उन्होंने मेरी ब्रा भी उतार कर खूँटी पर टांग दी।
    सहेली: फिर तो जरूर कुछ मजेदार हुआ होगा?
    लड़की: हाँ हुआ था ना बहुत मजा आया।
    सहेली: क्या हुआ था?
    लड़की: इतने सारे कपड़े लादने की वजह से खूँटी टूट गई और वो सारी रात खूँटी ही ठोकते रह गए।